Awkward and Awesome Thursday...LBlueD

Hollah y'all.  It's Thursday, which means I am going to lay some Awkward and Awesome on your happy selves.  The good news is, there is a lot more AWESOME than awkward this week...which is probably due to the fact that I didn't ride MUNI this week.  Ready?  OK!  (that is cheerleader for let's do this).

 Wearing: Dress: TopShop.  Shoes: Aldo. Jewelry: Michael Kors, H&M, and other randomness.

AWKWARD

- The first pee after eating asparagus at lunch...Y'all know what I am talking about.  In case you were wondering, this is why that happens.  Pretty messed up.

- About 6 people have had breakdowns on me this week.  Is mercury in retrograde?

- Getting really nervous and shaky about introducing myself to someone...this is coming up in Awesome though.

- Realizing last night that all I have done all week on this blog is talk about BritBrit.  Sorry I am such a spaz about her...hopefully yall at least thought that was funny.

AWESOME

- This dress!  It's my favorite and I have only been able to wear in twice in the two years I have had it because it is always way too cold here.

- Lots of plans are being made for some fun times with some of my favorite SF ladies.  This makes me so happy I can barely sit still

- The weather in Frisco this week is simply amazing.  Seriously, 85 today.  I know it won't last long so, I am going to enjoy every single second of it.  

- OK, friends.  This is by far one of the coolest things that has happened to me lately.  I have followed a certain blog for about a year.  It's called Style Porn, and this girl basically singlehandedly inspired me to finally get my ass into gear and start blogging myself.  Well, I was at the Rib Whip (insert drool here) today for lunch, and I see this girl.  I was with a couple of my buddies and I immediately start acting socially awkward because I see her.  I then start shaking and fretting over if I should go introduce myself.  This entire freakout sesh lasted about 10 minutes.  Well, friends, the blogger gods smiled on your girl and provided the perfect opportunity for me to meet one of my blogging inspirations.  Joanna and I met and it was like a clap of thunder between the force of both of our amazingsparklelicious lives.  I actually hugged her...which is freaking weird, and I am super sorry about that.  Once again, socially awkward penguin ruins a perfect moment of me making a friend.  Anyways, y'all stop by and say hi to Joanna at Style Porn.  She is ridiculously effortlessly cool and may be one of the sweetest girls I have ever met.  

For more Awkward and Awesome, go see Sydney at The Daybook.

Guts!

Angie

The Mister's Favorite Dress

Today may be my favorite day this week, thus far.  For one thing, it's 72 and sunny here in Frisco (insert giddydance here).  Secondly, this dress makes me supremely happy.  You may be wondering "what's with the dress?"  Let me tell you about this dress.  This is THE dress.  This is The Mister's favorite dress.  This is the dress that made him stop in his tracks.  The good news is, it still does! 

Ladies, y'all know how it is...once you make your man stop in his tracks first thing in the morning, there just 'aint one thing that will get in your way for the rest of the day. I have been giving any stank coming my way the Nene:

Wearing: Dress: H&M.  Jacket: Zara.  Belt: LV.  Necklace:  The hotness from my Momma. Heels: Aldo

Please notice that The Mister put up the chain on the fire escape so I didn't fall 2 stories today...That didn't keep my heels from getting stuck in the slats, which is why I keep looking down in these pics.

So, yesterday morning, I woke up at 5:30 am and downloaded Femme Fatale.  Basically,  Britney did this to me:

  "Good Morning Ang, you are totes my BFFL, so here is some earglitterbrainworms.  Let's go throw it on the dancefloor."  to which I said, "Thanks, but let me have some coffee first, and then I will be your backup dancer but keep me on your right side."

Front to back, I love the album (are they still albums if you buy them on iTunes?  Someone please advise).  I walk on sunshine when I hear it.  I could do without the weird "Willow-esque" flute solo on Criminal, but whatevs...I think she is giving one of her cajun cousins a chance at the big time.  Sooooooo, good luck with that, Cousin Cooter. Big Fat Bass, How I Roll and Beautiful are basically unicorn piss (excellence).  My favorites are still Hold It Against Me, How I Roll and Till the World Ends = Perfection.

Puffy Hearts.

Angie

PdotS: Clearly, I figured out how to add gif's to the blog so, you can go ahead and look forward to an entirely new and animated level of my ridiculousness.

I Can Be Your Treble You Can Be My Bass

Happy Britney Day to you all.  I don't have much to say because I am walking on sunshine and trying to make my ears bleed by listening to Femme Fatale on repeat.

Wearing: Dress & Blazer: F21.  Boots: Steve Madden

I know that the new album is getting mixed reviews, but I really like it...Her performance on Good Morning America, not so much.  Let's just say, I am happy I didn't wait in line to go see that.

High Fives,

Angie

Pretty Girl Rock

 Happy Monday Care Bears.  We are supposed to have great weather in Frisco this week, so I am going to bring you a week of dresses.  I can't tell you all how truly happy that this makes me.  I love wearing dresses because of how feminine they make me feel...especially this little lace number.  Of course I had to wuss rock it up a little with a leather jacket and some fun accessories.

Wearing: Dress: Modcloth.  Jacket: Ambiance.  Boots: Mia.  All Accessories: Gifted from The Mister.

ZOMG, yall!  Tomorrow is the day I have been waiting for since 2008.  BritBrit's new album Femme Fatale releases and you should all know that I have it on pre-order from iTunes so, as soon as I wake up, I will be bumping it until my ears bleed glitter and rainbows shoot out of my fingertips.  As the President of the SF Chapter of the Britney Spears Sparkle Club*** I will give you all a full review of the sparklegemawesomeness, because you know that's what it is going to be.  SOLIDPLATINUMGLITTER!

Britney made her comeback this weekend to "reclaim her gays" in SF and Pauly D actually DJ'd for her opening act!  Me not being at this concert may be one of the most devastating things that has happened in my charmed life. The night before the concert  I get the following text from the Head Italian Gay (H.I.G) at 1:00 am:

H.I.G:  Hey girl.  Sorry to text so late but I am at Mezzanine and there is a STRONG rumor that Britney will be a surprise guest at 2am

Me: FFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!  Thanks for the heads up.  LMK if that materializes.

Turns out it was just a Britney drag queen that showed up.  Could you imagine the crazy cat fight that would have happened if I got my happy ass out of bed, and threw on my best hookstar outfit and got across town to show up with some tragichotmess drag queen acting like my BFFL?  I would have snatched that weave out of her head.  JK.   

So, Brit, when you are ready to kick it glitterrainbowsparkle style and drink some Ed Hardy Rose', you know where I am.

Keep On Dancin' Till The World Ends,

Angie

***(this is a totally made up club that I conjured up while in high school and I am the only member...not by lack of trying, I guess I just didn't know enough gays in HS.)

The Mister's Rules

Happy Sunday Y'all.  I know, I know...I promised you The Mister's Rules on Fridays, but sometimes life gets in the way.  Trust me, this edition of The Mister's Rules is a good one, so it will hopefully be worth the wait.  As always, my commentary is in bold.  Here is my Mister:

Wearing: Jeans: 7's.  Sweater: F21.  Blazer: H&M. Boots: Urban Outfitters. Aviators: Mosley Tribes.

"How hurt were you when you showed up to the club this weekend, without my advice? If you are from the Bay it was freezing and raining and yet you still showed up to Ruby Skye hours before 94.9's ladies night out on Thursday night.... sat in lawn chairs w umbrella's... hahhahaha!!!!! You know who you are! you are probably sick now and got drunk way too fast and didn't even get to see the male strippers!!! (They have male strippers at this?  How did I not know about this?  THUNDER!!!) Most likely you threw way too big panties... (gstring) at Baby Bash and now feel really stupid (OMG, are you cereal? Who is so positive about themselves that they are doing this?  I'm pretty sure NONE of my classynottrashy readers.). It happens though (does it?)... so don't trip... us guys know who you are (what a relief!).

Ok. Down to business. Halter tops Ms.'98!! Translates into Ho cake central to us guys (bahahahahahahahahahahahah). Wearing a tight wifebeater and some stone washed jeans... now that is a sexy look, you have got to have swagger with that one though. (Duely noted...Like this girl, this girl, and the originators of that look...Who is talking about 1998 now? That was basically my uniform through college, BTW, and your girl was hot!)

Tip...Lets try to not buy something that you see on another breezy and say,"oh... that looks good". No, if you do such a thing wear it in a totally different way than how you noticed it. Too many chicks where the same freaking thing!!! Hence the Marina uniform! Lululemon and starbucks (Y'all know who you are)...Come on now! yoga mat slung over your shoulder and the only pose you know is downward dog??? (OHHHHHHH SNAP!!!!!!!) We don't buy it, even if the pants hug the right places... that latte is still 400 calories and thats the "skinny" version (bahahahahahahahahahaha, doesn't translate into being committed to skinny). Try wearing an Under Armour outfit, ladies. Guys will see it and know you are about something and have an edge about you (I can dig it)...And the thought (she knows what she is doing) will cross through our minds!"

So there you have it lovebugs.  My Mister does not only want to make sure you don't look like a fool at the club he wants to make sure you don't look like you are trying too hard at Starbucks and he wants you to stick to the daily drip, keep it black, and skip the latte.  Remember, as I always say, a moment on the lips, forever on the hips.

High Fives!

Angie

Happy 25th Birthday, Brother.

You will all have to bear with me for one post, while I gush over my brother.  Today, my bubbers turns 25.  I remember vividly when my parents brought him home to me and I told them it was cute that they thought that baby was theirs...He belonged to me from that point on, and I took the best care of him that I could.  

You see, my parents brought home this blue eyed blonde haired baby, that I was smitten with from the first time I laid eyes on him.  Of course, I was secretly pissed when I found out I was going to have a sibling.  As the first born grandchild, I had been the star of my big fat Italian family for nearly 5 years at this point and I was not going to let some BOY steal the stage from me.  Well, I met him and we decided right away that we could be sidekicks.  And for the last 25 years, that is exactly what we have been.

Of course I had to beat the tar out of him sometimes, but that was just so he knew his place.  My mom always told me to be nice to him because one day he would be bigger than me.  That happened a lot quicker than any of us wanted it to.  I remember him being such a fearless, strong willed child who would climb the tallest trees, tumble down the stairs head first, and love being dirty and STINKY.  (Dude, seriously, you got to get that stink thing under control, it's bothersome.)

Ant, you have always been the one person in the world who can make me laugh uncontrollably, and who can make the rest of the world disappear when we are together.  

(Clearly, this picture was taken before I learned about the benefits of eyebrow grooming, and when your hair cut resembled a butt.):

Even though you have been in China for two years, it doesn't make me miss you any less.  It actually makes me miss you more.  The one thing that I have come to realize since you have been gone is that I had always walked through life, thinking that you needed me to be there to always protect you and take care of you and help steer you in the right direction...I was 100% completely wrong.  Ant, you didn't need me, I needed you for all those reasons.  I always have and always will.  We all do...Mom, Dad, Marisa, and the rest of our family.

We need your light heartedness, your intelligence, your sense of humor, your acrobatics, and your flat out ridiculousness.  

Anthony, I am so proud of you.  I am proud that you are pursuing your dreams and personal goals in China on your own accord.  

You are the best brother two girls could ever ask for.  You are wonderful son, grandson, cousin, pie eater, and most of all, my best friend.  

Take it easy ladies!

Happy Birthday Ant'ny.  I love you very much!  Brothers are the best!

"Who's Anthony? Who's Anthony?  My brother!"

Smangela

Awkward and Awesome Thursday - It's Tricky

It's Awkward and Awesome Thursday!  The day you look forward to all week when I bring you at least one anecdote that involves something disgusting.  First though, let's discuss this outfit.  It gives me the happiness.  You should know something, since our friendship is blossoming into full blow BFFL's...I LOVE RUN DMC.  If I find a Run DMC t-shirt, I will always buy it.  

Wearing: Jacket: vintage Carolina Herrera, thrifted. Jeans: 7's. Boots: Marc Jacobs. Necklace: Marc Jacobs.  Watch: Mikey.  Belt: Louis Vuitton

AWKWARD:

- Having a sneeze on deck for the past two days that I simply cannot get out.

- When you are walking with your umbrella in the rain and it flips inside out and you can't get it to go back the right direction.  This is always so embarrassing to me.

- A cabbie feeling up my leg on Saturday night...Story listed under awesome.

- Tickets selling out for Britney within 3 minutes.  Made me do this face:

- Why do these videos keep surfacing?  Apparently Skreech's daughter is signed with Ark Music as well, and she has a thing about jeans:

AWESOME:

-Ok, so, for the cabbie story.  The Mister and I took a cab to dinner on Saturday night and we arranged for the same cabbie to pick us up afterwards.  When we got in the cab after dinner, the cabbie asked me if we had left a bag in the car.  Neither of us had but she handed me the bag anyways and I opened it to find some beautiful black cashmere OTK socks that took the outfit I was wearing to a whole new level.  Needless to say, the socks are now mine.  HOWEVER, when I showed her how good the socks looked on me, she reached back and felt up my leg. (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) So, that was completely AWKWARD.

- I just celebrated one year working at my job and received a sicktight belt buckle that I am now looking for a belt to put on.

- Being able to put a bun on top of my head on a rainy day so that my hair doesn't look like Diana Ross on a bender

- UF playing in the Sweet 16 in 45 minutes.  GO GATORS!!!!

It's Tricky to rock a rhyme, to rock a rhyme that's right on time
It's Tricky!

Angie

Glam Rock

Today's outfit was inspired by this effortlessly chic 6fttallskinnybitch.:

 Alessandra Ambrosia, you give me the sadmads with this look.  

Seriously, how does she look that cool?  I can't ever pull this totally off because A: I am a total goober and B: This is me laughing because The Mister pointed out that I was about to fall 2 stories. I am a total Klutz, and there is an 85% probability that I could have fallen if he hadn't pointed that out. C: Farrah Fawcet came by this morning an did my hrrrrrrrr for me.  Seriously, this coif would have worked really well if I was wearing my flares with wedges, however I am not.  

Wearing: Leather Jacket: Ambiance.  Flannel: Thrifted.  T-Shirt: American Apparel.  Sequin dress worn as a tank: Arden B. Jeggings: BlankNYC. Booties: Steve Madden.  Jewelry:  crapload of Marc Jacobs, F21, and Michael Kors.

This is the second time I have worn this dress as a layering piece, which makes me happy that I can use it other than once a year in Vegas when I dress like I "shoplift my clothes from Fashion Bug" .  It's like a golden nugget.  I have been wearing dresses and skirts so much lately that jeans have been making me feel like I look a little too boyish. But, the gold sparkles, glammed this up enough to make me put on my glittersmile.

Speaking of golden nuggets.  Anyone in the Bay Area have a birthday coming up?  I will totally order this guy to come and give you the sparklegemmiest, wussrockingest, dingdongingest, your day ever.

Okkkkkkkkuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrr.

Angie

You Must Be My Lucky Star

'Sup peeps.  I hope your week is off to a great start.  I am still being influenced by Madonna's wardrobe in Desperately Seeking Susan today.  I am even wearing a rosary.  Not sure how that one is going to go over with the family.... 

Friends, I think I am off my A game today because I have the sadmads that both my girls, Gagaloo and Britney Jean will be in the Bay Area over the next week and I don't get to see either of them.  I guess formatting my plan for success after Gaga and B.J.S has no bearing these days.  I have resorted in turning to the head Italian Gay. This guy has more connections than any one person should be allowed and I am crossing my fingers that he can orchestrate the encounter in which Britney and I will be BFFL's.

Wearing: Legging and Shoes: F21.  Sweater: Vintage.  Dress: Urban

I am calling in all my favors, lighting prayer candles, and doing my rosary in hopes that God will hook a sista up.  In the meantime, I am just going to continue to emulate, the original "It" girl, Madonna, without the horrible perm though.

Seal Clubbing:

"You May Be My Lucky Star.  But I'm The Luckiest By Far."

Angie

Sunny With A Chance Of Earth Shake

Happy Monday Friendsters!  Did you have a good weekend?  I certainly did.  I had some much needed QT with The Mister.  We ate like total jerks.  Food so good it will make you want to slap someone...We are talking calzone, pizza, flat iron steak, lamb meatballs, salumi plates, lamb shanks, half chickens, omeletes, oh and zeppole with Nutella.  I even had a cabbie give me a pair of OTK cashmere socks.  I also watched Desperately Seeking Susan last night. I swear I would wear absolutely EVERYTHING that Madonna rocks in that movie.  My wardrobe today was inspired and influenced by watching that last night. 

Wearing: Dress: F21.  Jacket: Ambiance.  Sunnies: RayBan.  Sparkle Knuckles: gifted from The Mister. Boots: Mia

Y'all, I have to be honest, I am a little stressed out these days.  You see, every time I turn on the news or look at my twitter account or facebook feed, I see things like this Quake Predictor, and this Earthquake Expert telling me that within the next 30 hours to a week the big one is going to hit.  To make things worse, this SF Gate Survival Kit, says I basically need to have my 3 bedroom apartment in tow for eight days.  My nervous pee is off the charts!  I mean, even Matt Lauer is talking to me about this in the mornings... and to be real with you, he is way too handsome to be scaring me that badly before I am fully caffeinated.  Al Roker's extra skin should be the most frightening thing that I have to deal with before 9 am.  But, noooooooooo, everyone wants to tell me that me and my beloved city are going to "liquify".  (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)  Liquify????????!!!!!  WTH Does that even mean? I am from Florida so, I am used to natural disasters, however, we know those are coming far enough in advance to stock up on enough fixin's for mojitos and black beans & yellow rice for 2 weeks. 

I will definitely be putting these sparkle knuckles in my survival kit:

God does love me with big puffy hearts though, because he hooked me up with a good hair day.  Also, I better not get crushed with a building before I get my family's recipe for sausage and mushrooms, which is on it's way via snail mail from my grandmother.  The Mister will not be pleased if he doesn't get to eat that before we fall into the Pacific.

Shaken, not stirred.

Angie

The Mister's Rules Friday

Happy Friday buddies.  I have to tell you, this may be my new favorite outfit.  I absolutely adore it and am realizing that I am borderline obsessed with mixing navy and black together.  This however, is not what I am here to talk to you about today.  Today is the inaugural post for the The Mister's Rules Friday.  

Wearing: Dress as Skirt: Modcloth.  Sweater: Vintage Ralph Lauren, thrifted.  Boots: Piperlime.  Jacket: Ambiance. Jewelry: Mikey, F21, Saints bracelet I bought while traveling in Honduras.

I became keenly aware during the 30x30 challenge that my Mister not only was a huge inspiration in how I put outfits together, but the guy had very developed thoughts and opinions on how women dress.  You guys all read how he wasn't a fan of socks with open toed shoes, and then I wore it and he liked it.  I knew at that point, that these little nuggets and opinions needed to be published for you all to be in the know.  With no further adieu, Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you, The Mister (my commentary in parenthesis and in bold, obv).

"I read something when I cam across Kim Kardashian's Twitter account and she said that confidence in your girlfriend is power.  I say that there is a thin line between a woman being confident and being cocky (real talk).  No self respecting man likes a cocky woman when they first meet.  Confident, yes.  Approachable, yes.  Stylish, a must (obviously, this is why we are together).   

A woman acting like their shit don't stink, when you can not only smell it but have to step over it on the streets of the Tenderloin (!!!!!!!!!!GAG!  Please note, if you are walking around the Tenderloin and you see poop on the ground, it is not from an animal.  It is human crap so, watch your step.).  You are going home either alone or to be used as a shell catcher (OMG, holy Jersey Shore reference). 

Truth be told, guys don't care how much your outfit costs, just as long as whatever you are wearing makes you look good.  You should be owning the clothes, not the clothes owning you.  It only works if you are approachable though, (so, keep in mind that your smile is the best accessory you can wear).  Your attitude makes it all work together.  And oh yeah, Don't wear leather pants with OTK leather boots unless you make your income by swinging from a pole, otherwise, it's not a good look."

So, there you have it friends!  I hope you all enjoy The Mister's knowledge he is dropping on you, because there is a lot more where that came from.  I hope you all have a lovely weekend full of sparkelgem goodness.

Happiest Girl In The World,

Angie

Awkward and Awesome Thursday +30x30 round-up

Happy Thursday Everyone.  I am finally going to do my 30x30 roundup.  Don't worry, it is of no relation to that crappy Whiskey Tango country bar in Trampa, FL.  I do not endorse or recommend that bar to anyone visiting the greater Tampa area, unless of course you are into jorts and guys with wads of tobacco in their lip doing the Gator, whilst wearing a Southern Heritage big mouth bass camo t-shirt...in which case, if that's your thing, go on over to the Roundup, or pretty much anywhere in North Tampa, your soulmate awaits you. 

I lost outfit #14, by no fault of my own...It pissed magic unicorn excellence.  This was the best illustration of that I could find.

The Misters Faves:  2, 9, 18, 27 and 4

My Faves: 4, 9, 18, 25, 21 and 30

Mom's Fave: 21...Just to note, for New Years Eve, 1987, my mom wore an outfit very similar to #21, and took a photo which will forever be emblazoned upon my memory. This explains why I dress like I do.

AWKWARD:

- Sitting next to a woman on MUNI on Monday who was not only wearing the most personally offensive perfume, but opened up a tuna fish sandwich and ate it on the bus.  After her nutritious breakfast, girl started monkey grooming her hair and ears.  I am incredibly bothered by people's disgusting habits and smells.  I literally had my scarf around my mouth and nose and was dry heaving with tears streaming down my face for the better part of 30 minutes. She receives the Jerk of the Week Award.

- looking at all of my 30x30 photos next to each other makes me thankful for the rest of my closet and  reminds me that I need to learn some new poses.  Also, resemblance of my wardrobe to Teresa from RHONJ is uncanny.

- Hearing every bodily function of the manatee I share a residence with.

AWESOME:

- This phone call from the Mister: "What kind of Girl Scout cookies do you want?"

Me: TAGALONGS

Mister: Can I have two boxes of tagalongs?

Me: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!  You do love me!

- An incredibly successful trip to the thrift store which resulted in me obtaining a vintage Evan Piccone wool camel colored skirt suit, a Carolina Herrera mixed tweed cropped blazer, and a Ralph Lauren cashmere sweater, which totaled less than $40.

-Rolling 12 games of bowling on a Sunday night

- Being inspired by Madonna's wardrobe in Desperately Seeking Susan

-March Madness!!!!!  Go Gators!

- In honor of St. Patrick's day, I give you this:

Gimme da gold.  I want da gold.

Angie